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Originally posted by neo_prodigy at Why You Should Support Tulpa And Hollowstone

If you've been following me for a minute, then you know I've been a radical supporter of afro_dyte's upcoming play, Tulpa, Or Anne & Me. And if you've been following afro_dyte for a minute, then you know that she's been a radical supporter of my upcoming novel, Hollowstone.

But this isn't about two friends plugging the other's project. No, this is something far bigger and meaningful at work.

If you've followed either of us on our blogs, Ars Marginal, or on other spaces, then you know that we not only do we critique and analyze how the media gets it wrong, but we also like to boost the signal on those who are doing it right.

These projects are important not because afro_dyte and myself are at the helm, and for the sake of discussion I’m taking us out of the equation for a moment. Tulpa and Hollowstone are important because queer POCs are fighting to have their voices heard in a world that would rather we didn’t exist. You don't have to look far to find the racism, misogyny and queerphobia that we have to contend with in the media, online, and everyday life.

You see, this is how change begins. Not with a bang but with a first step. Two minorities who got sick and tired of being sick and tired are stepping up to make our voices heard, to share our stories, our art, our gifts with the rest of the world. Not because we're the creators but because we're fighting for something bigger than ourselves. Both Tulpa and Hollowstone have something profound that needs to be shared with the world.

But we can’t do it alone.

If you’re tired of seeing women, POCs, LGBTQs be denigrated, ignored and erased, this is an opportunity to take a stand and make a change. This is an opportunity for you to vote with your dollars and support two excellent campaigns that is fighting for better representation, that is telling our stories.

So for those of you who have boosted the signal and has shown us some love, we can't thank you enough and we humbly ask that you please continue to show your love for these wonderful projects. We can’t do it without you.

[walks away from the pulpit]

Question of the morning!

What book, or author, you regularly see displayed in a bookstore annoys you every time you see it?

I haven't been in a book store in awhile, but off the top of my head:
Twilight (and all trashy vampire novella tbh)
The Secret
The final Harry Potter books *sigh*
Dan Brown (and all Grail Knight wannabe crap)
Anything pink with high heels and/or martini glasses
Books republished while being produced as a film, especially if the covers are based on the film (LotR i'm looking at you)
Books about "the differences between men and women and how to overcome them". Eww.
YA novels about shopping. Damn
Depending on the topic, some of the "____ for Dummies"
I roll my eyes and go "blah" looking at all the over-priced "spooky kid" stuff (not including JTHM but including Lenore, Emily the Strange)

i totally am looking forward to seeing works by Glenn Beck/Sarah Palin in the near future, so i can lol mightily

Share yours!

On Divorcing Slurs from Their Contexts
: There are men (and women) who would swear up, down, and backwards that they're not homophobic, and may even genuinely be supportive of full LGBTQ equality, but nonetheless continue to use the word fag to malign other men—or use "gay" as a negative descriptor. They just like the words. They don't want to give them up, because they haven't found anything else that feels quite so good rolling off the tongue as "What a fag!" and "That's so gay." Who's it hurting? I totally don't hate gay people! And that's why we get these tortured explanations of how they're not using them "in the gay way."

On "Bitch" and Other Misogynist Language: Life is hard enough without my unexpectedly smacking people in the face who trust me not to be a jerk, and it's in that same spirit that I've tried to convey how misogynist language is uncool—hey, I don't want to get blindsided with shit like that from an ostensible ally. When I highlight the use of sexist language at a male-authored blog, it's because such language is alienating and demeaning and infuriating and I'm operating under the assumption that those bloggers don't want to alienate, demean, and infuriate their female readers. But that, as it turns out, usually tends to be a faulty assumption.

On Allegedly Looking for Things to Get Mad About: The truth is, if I actually spent my days actively paying attention to every example of misogyny around me, I would be a profoundly unhappy woman. Not bitchy or grumpy or short-tempered, but paralyzingly depressed. Women have to train themselves to avoid consciously reacting to every bit of misogynistic detritus permeating the culture through which we all move, lest they go quite insane. I write about the things I can't not write about. If I wrote about all the examples of sexism I see every day, I'd never sleep.

On Feminism and Humanism: As long as there are men, who would ostensibly be part of the "humanist" movement, yet retain a visceral and violent reaction to the feminine, there is no foundation for a sexless, "humanist" movement. Generally, those arguing in favor of a "humanist" movement won't say they're arguing for men's inclusion, instead citing what they perceive as the limitations of feminism/womanism—"But what about gay people or people of color or the disabled or the poor or…?" they ask, as if there is something intrinsic to feminism that precludes also fighting other biases. The truth is, if one is genuinely concerned with the betterment of women, one is necessarily concerned with fighting biases against any marginalized group, because, half (give or take) of all such groups are women.

Rape Culture 101:
A rape culture is a complex of beliefs that encourages male sexual aggression and supports violence against women. It is a society where violence is seen as sexy and sexuality as violent. In a rape culture, women perceive a continuum of threatened violence that ranges from sexual remarks to sexual touching to rape itself. A rape culture condones physical and emotional terrorism against women as the norm. In a rape culture both men and women assume that sexual violence is a fact of life, inevitable as death or taxes. This violence, however, is neither biologically nor divinely ordained. Much of what we accept as inevitable is in fact the expression of values and attitudes that can change. Read for a more substansive, less abstract description.

I'm posting these because i've recently had discussions with friends who aren't familiar with these issues or are misinformed. I don't "push my agenda" to frustrate anyone or to start conflict, i speak up because the language people use is damaging and alienating. I have educated, progressive friends who casually throw around "bitch" or "gay" and i WILL call them out on it, as i do with myself if i slip. I am not in the habit of wasting time on lost causes, if i didn't think you would be receptive to concerns i wouldn't bother.

update: three hours after surgery

made some jelly, set time 4 hours. Hopefully by then eating it will be possible. Apparently you shouldn't put fresh pineapple, kiwi fruit or paw paw in jelly, it wont set. Cool.

Numbness now only in bottom lip and chin.

Throat is more noticably sore than gums.

Drinking water is fine, little painful

Grapes aren't possible, jaw wont open wide enough.

Peanut size is fine, chewing however not great.

Squishy stuff it is!

No longer need cotton buds between gums, bleeding stopped.

Btw, i got a $100 fine from transperth for having a concession ticket (empty smartrider) and apparently my consession smartrider has expired. Not cool.

Check this shit out mother fuckers

Too numb to have a drink. That's lame.
Victim blaming, this stuff makes me ill

Deuteronomy 22:23-24
23 If a man happens to meet in a town a virgin pledged to be married and he sleeps with her, 24 you shall take both of them to the gate of that town and stone them to death—the girl because she was in a town and did not scream for help, and the man because he violated another man's wife. You must purge the evil from among you.

Shouldn't this be even a little outdated by now?

a letter from this week's Savage Love:

I am in a strange situation. I work in the corporate sector in marketing and sales. It is a high-stress, fast-paced job, and everyone has a short fuse. I have a coworker who is losing business to a competitor who happens to be gay. In her fits of anger, she keeps calling him a faggot. I hate it. The thing is, I am not gay. And if anyone in our office is, they are in the closet. She has used the word in front of other coworkers and even our boss, and no one seems to be bothered.

I am torn about what I should do. I am black, and if she were using the word "nigger," I would call her on it and raise issue with our HR department. Can I file a complaint on behalf of a group I do not belong to? If she found out I complained, she would see it as a threat to her own job, which could lead to a decidedly hostile workplace. But if it were a racial slur, I would not let that deter me. I want to do the right thing. How would you handle the situation?

Not My Problem?

If someone at my office were tossing the word "nigger" around, NMP, I would lodge a complaint. I would resent the assumption on my coworker's part that since I'm white she can use racist speech in my presence, because, hey, all us white people are racist POS, right? And I would complain because a workplace that tolerates racist remarks is a workplace that tolerates homophobic remarks. If people are using "nigger" when there aren't any black people in the room, they're doubtless using "faggot" when there aren't any gay people in the room. And vice versa. Have a word with HR.

-Dan Savage

helps plskthx

okies...am currently reading Y: the last man graphic novel series in .cbr format. Using Comic Book Lover app to view on my shiny mac *nuzzles*

However! no. 35 refuses to open! msg flashes "Error recognising format of comic"! every other one has been fine! i've even had jason send me HIS copy of 35 and THAT ONE wont open either!!!!

so solutions pls?